but this is the last entry for my blog.

becuase by this time tomorrow, or even more likely, by the time you read this i'll actually be home.

not my apartment in fuji japan home, i mean home home.

in my own home, in my own bed, with family, with friends, with oscar, with trash cans.

i've more or less spent the last few weeks saying my goodbyes to everyone whom i wanted to say goodbye to, and yet even so it feels like i'm forgetting some people. even so, it never really is `goodbye` is it. it's more of a `see you later` kind of feeling to it.

it's hard to actually imagine how many lives you can be a part of and how many of theirs can be a part of yours, and that it never really boils down to it until you see what happens when you have to part ways for a potentially infinite amount of time.

but to everyone i've met, and to every place i've been, and to every thing i've done while here in japan, it's almost surreal that this day has finally come; my last day in japan.

at this time two years ago, i arrived in japan starry eyed and filled with a sense of motivation i have not felt in a long while. a sense of excitement that begged me to run around to look behind every corner to see if there was something new to discover. though the starryness has faded from my eyes quite some time ago, i still find myself with that sense of curiosity and adventure. almost a kind of wanderlust that has been instilled into my very being just by being here.

but more importantly, to me anyways.

as eager as i was to start anew and see what life here had in store for me, there was a slight twang of doubt, a small nagging quesetion of whether or not i could do it, if i could survive. if the very things that i had hoped to accomplish before i came to japan and even then the things i hoped to have accomplished while in japan always worried me in the sense of that i might find myself on this day with a sense of, well, regretting japan.

and as ominous, for lack of a better word really, as that may seem, i find myself here at work on my very last full day with my bags overstuffed and possibly breaking and no real clue how i'm going to get everything home, i can sit here with one of the largest grins on my face knowing that,

i did it.

p.s. i won every one of those bets.

p.p.s. i'm just sad no one actually put any money on them :[.

p.p.p.s. with a heavy heart, and a big hug.

-jeff

i couldn't fall asleep till about 1:30am last night, and woke up an hour later to go fishing...

we only caught one fish.

and it was a baby.

and at first i was thinking of highly suggesting that we throw it back from whence it came as to, you know, not overfish and what not. then i also remembered that my teacher got 4 hrs of sleep, took his boat, bought ice, and stayed up for two to three hours with me trying to catch fish...

i kept my mouth shut haha.

anyways after that i got back, passed out for an hour again as i was headed up to tokyo to meet up with masaya for the last time.

to my joy and surprise he brought his senpai, hirayama san (or yasu) and his wife (orie). and let me tell you, i haven't seen masaya in a year since he left for germany a year ago around this time. he invited me to nagano to go snow boarding and always opened his door if we needed a place to crash in tokyo. for just that alone, i am grateful. but more importantly he's been an amazing friend and genuine about his effort and want to speak english and be my friend as well.

we had lunch, went shopping, played mario kart with the four of us (awesome btw!) and went to shoot pool.

which i think was the highlight.

we played 2v2 and it was me and hirayama san and masaya and hirayama san's wife. yasu and i were the underdogs, going 0-2 (no thanks to me, the f-up count is me 3 and him 1 lol), but with a turn of events (his wife sunk the 8 ball on the second shot), and quite possibly a miracle shot from yasu san, we tied it up 2-2 and could leave it happy knowing that we (yasu and i) were not completely creamed.

some of the most fun i've had in a long time, honest.

then we made our way up to nerima, where for 4 straight times, the elusive katsu shop has, well, eluded me. literally.

i also learned about this place from yasu a year and some change ago.

the story behind it is that melissa and i came up here after recontracting orientation and we... ended up not ordering the katsu (even though we thought we did)... and then the next time mel and i and chris found it was closed, and then mel, chris, annabelle, and i found it was closed, and then (though i can't remember) but i have this feeling that a fourth time it was closed as well, but i FINALLY got my katsu!!!

huzzah!

and it was absolutely delicious.

but one thing really got to me that i didn't even realize.

for you see i thought that masaya was in tokyo just to look for a job and that he's been here for a long time... and then he told me that he came out here, all the way from nagano, just to come see me.

and you know what else he did? even though it was completely out of the way, he stayed on the train with me to shinagawa and even waited for my train.

that's the kind of amazing guy he is and i only hope that all of you guys reading this will only get a chance to someday meet him.

he's an amazing friend who i'll never be able to forget, and the night that i got to share with them as my final night in tokyo was some of the best fun that i've been able to have in japan and i'm glad it was with them.

though i do admit that my biggest regret was that i didn't take any pictures while we were shooting pool

you know those moments where you and some good friends have a long good laugh that goes on for a long time, only to find all of you with teary eyes, difficulty breathing, a pain in your sides and just the greatest feeling of contentment afterwards?

that's what the whole night was like.

as i said before, my only real regret is that i could not stay another year with these wonderful people.

however.

i also realize that coming back home is what's best for me at my current time in life. i need to come home, i need to touch base, i want to continue moving forward in my life, and as much as i love jet, it does not help me accomplish that aspect of my life.

but there's something you all really need to understand.

that before i found this group, almost a year ago, my friend ryan recommended that i join a cultural aspect of japan, that i could not leave without having do so. but nothing seemed right. i tried taiko for a few weeks, however their pace didn't seem to allow new comers to find their place amongst the experienced. desparately i tried finding other medians that not only focused on japanese culture, but also my own interest.

and that's when i was introduced to iaido. that's when i met these absolutely amazing people for the last 7 months. people such as usasmi sensei, watanabe san, iketani san who took me under their influence to start from the very beginning and teach me everything i would need to know. who told me when i was in error (truly the sign of great teachers), and more so caring that i succed at what i did. if any of you ever get the chance to meet these people, i implore you to spend time with them and talk to them, for i can guarantee you'll learn something.

i am forever grateful to this opportunity that was presented to me, and as i said before, my only regret is that another year could not have passed with these people.

thank you. for everything. for giving me a chance. for teaching me. for letting me experience a part of your culture to the fullest and for caring that i understood it and did well in it.

i'll always remember you guys for you will probably never fully understand what you all have meant to me.

tonight i had my farewell enkai from my teachers at yoshi shou. though only 5 teachers showed up, they were 5 teachers that i was incredibly close to; fukushima sensei, tajima sensei, tomono sensei, oya sensei, and goto sensei.

now most of you may know them from a lot of my stories, but tonight was different. they all said thank you for the last two years, but that wasn't the thing that got to me the most, and i can't quite place my finger on it.

after awhile, and a few pints, i said that i wanted to say something. i told each one of them why they were special to me, why they meant a lot to me, and more importantly that because of amazing people like you, i could have come this far. i don't really know how to describe in words how i felt, but i had to pause many times to stop myself from crying. i once thought of how happy i would be to leave this stinky little town of mine, but tonight i found it so impossible to tell them that i'm leaving even though everyone knew.

even though i knew.

i'm really am glad to have stayed a second year. i'm really am glad to have had the opportunity to meet these wonderful people. and i'm really thankful that these people were the group of japanese people that i was able to meet during my tenure here. it may not have been perfect or ideal, but what situation is you know?

so, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. i know that i've been saying it a lot, but i've meant it everytime i say it.

thank you. i wish you all the best in your futures, and thank you all for the wonderful experience that i will forever remember as my time in japan.

i never liked 'goodbyes.' i never will to be honest. but i guess way to put is this:

this is not 'goodbye,' this is 'see you later.'

it's been a great 7 months, and i've had a fantastic (said with a british accent) time! a big thank you to usami sensei for taking me under his wing, for showing me a part of japanese culture that i was so desparately seeking, for taking time out of his day to help me get my uniform and talking with me, a big thanks to watanabe san and iketani san for teaching me one on one, and a thank you to john for inviting me to participate.

my greatest regret in leaving japan, is that i only had 7 months with this wonderful group, but i am forever grateful for those 7 months at the same time.

お世話になりました。

last night was ryan's last night in japan. though he isn't leaving till the 26th, he's heading to tokyo as i'm writing this.

now the thing is, i know it's not the last time i'm going to see him cause, well, i'm flying to wisconsin 8/4 to drive down to tuscon with him arriving 8/10, but, well...

if you know me fairly well, then you know this will shock you a bit (in a good way of course), that the two people that i've met on jet that i've bonded the closest with were not asian at all. i mean don't get me wrong, i have a fair share of asian friends here, but ryan was (cause he left) the kind of guy who almost felt like family. i mean we've traveled all over south east asia together, we've done trips to tokyo, kamakura, nikko, we've chatted on end, karaoked for 4 hrs, eaten till we felt like dying, and more or less done it all.

i don't think words i can say here will describe just how amazing and how important our friendship is to me, and i know this all sounds cheesey, but i really do mean every word of it.

even though i know i'll see him in 10 days, i want to wish him the best in his life as a grad student at ua, and hope nothing but good things for him. he's been an amazing friend whom i've had the great privelage of getting to know him far beyond the shallow layers of acquaintances.

and i look forward to our road trip across the country.

oh yeah, i know what to say now.

thank you.

we started out at 10pm taking a total of about 6.5 hrs to reach the top, stopping 1.5-2 hrs at the rest stops inbetween mostly because we didn't want to wait at the top; which is freezing if you didn't know.

oh yeah, and it was pouring rain and windy as hell ;P BUT there was one really nice moment when the clouds parted and you could see the stars, twas nice.

not much to say except that i've been up for about 26 hrs, and still running on a bit of an o2 high.

all in all, glad neither of us had altitude sickness, and glad we both got to finally do it.

we're both alive, in one piece, well minus the times i 'died' about 11.5 times and her 5.5 times (slipping on the rocks, and falling on our arses), i swear my ankles and knees are completely shot..., and the time when we completely went off trail with a group of japanese tourists and a veteran climber (3 times she said), but eventually forged our way back!

but despite the rain and wind, we got to see a sunrise and a feeling of accomplishment... and finding that there is a post office at the TOP of mt. fuji.

you've got to be kidding me.

but as we made our way down, and an interesting sense of comradery overcame most everyone on that mountain. that we were all bound into this one crazy idea that `hey, we can scale mount fuji!` whether it be coming to the top together with the veterans, the hardcore groups who are dressed from head to toe with rain gear and head lamps and full rucksacks, or greeting each other on the way down from the youngest of children to the oldest of grandparents, to the other foreigners and the japanese self-defense force (who are prime examples of politeness and respect for those older than you), or from returning from your all night trek and seeing all the eager faces tackle the monumental task that you just finished not so long ago.

there was this genuine-ness of everyone's personalities and demeaner that put nothing but the largest grin on my face as i realize that i truly am going to miss all of this as the days roll down.

and finally after the long journey back, i parted ways with my white k-swisses, the shoes that have been with me for the last two years, who have seen just as much as i have, who have climbed the great wall, scaled the temples of angkor, walked along the streets of thailand, and back again, have been retired into a bin outside of fujinoimya station labeled `burnable.` perhaps the only real fitting end.

the runner up, but still good: after a year abroad in germany, the masaya is BACK! hopefully will get to see him before i leave.

the shocker: dad sold the bright gold 1985 dodge caravan le. it's gone!!!!! ZOMG!!! /disbelief!
...it only took 22 years! damn thing just wouldn't die.
update!:
bluebook value was at $322. in case any of you were wondering...

11 days. see you all soon!

in addition to every beginning and ending of each term, the school likes to do opening and closing ceremonies respectively, but this time there was an extra little slot for me.

it was for my farewell speech.

i told them all that the only reason why i didn't want to go back was because of them. that english is within their reach and that all they have to do is try. that i hope that they have found a place in their hearts for me because they all have a place in mine...

and then i spent the last three hours or so talking with my students, as many as i could find, taking 13809752908520937520935782035 pictures in the process... everyone telling me to write, thank you, to take care, to try my best, to come back, to not go back to america...

it's hard to believe that two years is finally coming to a close neh.

it was a good day today.

one that i'll never forget.

me: 880 during games is a bitch eh
mike: yeah
me: you going to carpool with mike or something?
mike: nah
mike: mike's coming from san mateo
mike: hmm
mike: i should leave now
mike: to make sure i get a parking spot at the bart station
mike: yeah i better leave
me: oh you're off to fremont then?
mike: nono
mike: i mean
mike: i'm gonna park at the oakland coliseum bart parking lot
mike: so i don't have to pay for parking at the coliseum parking
me: i... should have known
me: lol
mike: lol

and we'll leave this one anon... for obvious reasons. but it does answer the question: why do people really want an iphone?

anon: zomg hello from the toilet at work!
me: LOL
me: how long have you been waiting to do that?
anon: a while hhaha
me: just make sure to wash your hands
me: though, knowing you, you probably have your iphone in a sort of anti-scratch film thin case eh?+
anon: psh, my poo is super sterile
anon: not yet actually
me: lol
me: i think i need to quote that
me: just cause
me: anon of course...

you know, even i don't want to know. :P

final train ticket home: 500yen.

total spent: 500yen.

man i am tired.

like i did last year around this time, i met my japanese teacher from ucsd, itou sensei, in nagoya. this year, she is in japan again, and again, i made my way out to visit her.

i think the best i could say was that it was really really good to see her again. kind of, another year come full circle. we were able to talk a lot, and mninus her dismay at my japanese getting worse (serious, i've completely forgotten things i should have remembered first year), we had a really good time; i introduced her to the joys of unagi pie!

though, i do apologize that i spent a lot of the time talking...

but a big thank you to her for helping me figuring stuff out and a big thank you for lending me an ear. i was, and am really happy that i got a chance to meet up with her again, especially to be able to in japan nonetheless! we had a really late lunch, and i bought some omiyage for my teachers as i said goodbye with a hug and boarded the last shink that i would ride this time in japan.

subway fare back: 150yen.
late late lunch: 1000yen.
omiyage: 1050yen.
shink ticket: 7560yen.

but for me, it's not quite over yet...

upon arriving at mishima, i transferred to the izuhakone to finish the final leg of my trip. a dinner and karaoke session with ryan at our favorite restaurant owned by our friend teru, tony's to da max.

izuhakone ticket: 210yen.

now i was completely unprepared for what happened next.

when we walked in, we were greeted by souichiro and teru, but for once it was a serious kind of greeting, almost a finality to it all. he lead us to our usual seats and we found two packages, three items in each written out towards ryan and me.

teru and souichiro told us to open them, and we found a good luck charm that teru said would protect us so long as we kept it with us. a t-shirt that none of us knew how to read, but we agreed that the meaning of it all was that it's `too all the good friends that we've met and all the great memories we've shared, and that it never is `goodbye,` only `see you later`` and the last bit, that almost moved me to tears. almost. teru gave each of us two cards and wrote a personal message on both.

we chatted the night away, almost 5 hours there until we had to say goodbye.

he told us this meal was on the house.

but ryan and i weren't finished yet. what insued was a really good reason why concerts are usually no more than 2 hours long.

we karaoked for four hours finishing at 3am!

and it was good.

though it wasn't free, but it was relatively cheap: 1700yen.

it's the first time i missed the last train home, the first time i voluntarily took the first train home, and the closest i've pulled an all nighter in japan.

we made it back to ryan's place, and i promptly passed out.

total spent: 10670yen.

annabelle and i got up early again, as chris opted to sleep in again. we made our way to inari shrine in hopes that the day would be good enough to visit the fushimi inari shrine and it's famous 1000 tori gates or so. if any of you have seen memoirs of a geisha, this that scene when she's a child and running around, well, 1000 tori gates.

breakfast at a small french bread shop: 140yen.
train ticket to inari station: 140yen.

upon arriving at the station we exited to find only that we are greeted by a HUGE tori gate.

1

we continued up the path only to find another tori gate.

2

beginning our hike, we soon ran into the scene from memoirs of a geisha: 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15... i got bored around of counting around here. :P

in summary: the maps there of the local area are absolutely useless. you will not find where the heck you are at any given point in time, let alone the correct path to follow in hopes of finding your destination. there are no signs, just, a lot and i do stress `a lot` of tori gates... and every path more or less looks the same with a stone walkway and, well, a lot of gates.

oh yeah, and the punks sell 500 ml bottles of everything for 250 yen.

i bought one btw: 250yen.

annabelle and i walked around and were practically lost (i.e. maps useless) until we finally found ourselves back where we started, 2 hours later and unanimously agreed:

if anyone ever asked `oh, did you see the [insertwhateverisfamousthere]?`

we'd say `yes.`

making our way back to kyoto station we had lunch at an italian place before meeting up with chris. we walked the nishki market (packed and free samples galore!) and chilled in a book store (i read my favorite book, the things they carried by tim o'brien) while having danta! twas a happy way to end this trip by just relaxing and not feeling in a rush to get anywhere.

train ride back: 140yen.
lunch: 2000yen. <--- we were STARVING!
subway fares: 590yen.

and finally back to kyoto station, with bags in hand, and for chris to accomplish is ultimate goal.

now a little background information: chris LOVES ramen. he fell in love with it (as far as i'm aware) when he arrived in japan, and it is his meal of choice. that being said, we told him in the isetan nearby, there's a floor of ramen shops.

his ultimate goal: eat 3 bowls.

which he did might i add.

annabelle and i joined him for the first bowl, but afterwards we went to have green tea parfait...

chris joined us an hour later, quite possibly the happiest i've seen him, ever.

dinner that night: 450yen.

we headed back to the station where we bid each other farewell; for them, they were heading back to work and i was off to local it to nagoya in preparation for my continuing trip, like i said, quite possibly the busiest weekend for me, ever.

oh yeah, and because of japan, omiyage: 2600yen.

with that, i jumped the train to nagoya, local, and found myself there at 10:40pm: 2520yen.

running through my memory, i found my capsule hotel, grabbed a quick dinner at some random katsu place, and promptly passed out, giving into the exhaustion that i had been fending off for the last three and a half days.

capsule: 3900yen.
cheap dinner: 1200yen.

total spent: 13930yen.

though chris continued to sleep in heh.

annabelle and i headed back up to nazenji to get some pictures (we took a shot in front of nazenji, and, i kid you not, 3 groups took the exact same shot after us!) as well as walk the path of philosophy to ginkakuji. and guess what! BLUE SKY!!! we have a picture of said triumphant moment!

breakfast at conbini: 140yen.
subway fare: 250yen.

the walk was pretty cool. i mean it was along this old canal that had both this paved walkway and a kind of cobblestone walkway
with the japanese maples and cherry blossom trees canopying the surrounding areas created quite the effect. the small shops and cafes that lined the walk way before ginkakuji left you with a very mom and pop homey feeling that gave you a warm, almost nurturing embrace that made the humidity not as awful as it was.bottom line, it was nice.

there was one cafe, that if you're walking north from nazenji, that it smelled of baked apples and cinnamon, and it had a red canopy with the words `coffe & cake` written above with alabaster walls. cakes were 150yen, but we never had time, it's about halfway up the walk on your left. i hope someone (or myself one day) gets a chance to go there.

and finally we arrived at ginkakuji: 500yen.

walking around it, there was a nice rustic pavillion near a pond that i thought made a good shot. we walked around the garden a bit after that, and personally i thought it was gorgeous. i really really really love japanese maples and how they canopy over everything, almost more efficiently than american maples (if there is such a thing lol). but i think the conversation we have sums it up:

me: wow this is really nice!
annabelle: yeah, you ready to head out?
me: wait what? we haven't even seen the silver pavillion yet!
annabelle: uh... yeah we have.
me: when?
annabelle: remember that rustic old pavillion near the pond?
me: ...
annabelle: ...uh, yeah.
me: can we go back so i can get a picture in front of it? :D

next up was lunch. and i have to say, it was all kind of awesome! an udon shop called `omen` that is located behind the bus parking lot. they serve udon sets where everything is given separately: soup, noodles, veggies, sesame seeds, all that good stuff! i think pictures speak a lot better than i can...

lunch at omen: 1250yen.

btw, annabelle REALLY likes gobou.

i mean i do too... but she ate it all :[

(i'm just giving her a hard time, i had my share heh)

next on the list was kinkakuji, the golden pavillion, almost, the symbol of kyoto (in my eyes anyways). we jumped the bus to meet chris there; kyoto has quite possibly one of the poorest metro systems in japan that i've seen... BUT to compensate they have by far one of the best bus systems i've seen!

bus ride: 220yen. <---- good call on that btw annabelle!
souvenirs: 3000yen.

we met up with chris at kinkakuji and made our way to the gold (painted, seriously) pavillion to take the picture that everyone and their mother takes when they're there. serious. i mean everyone AND their mother was there!

i will say this much though, i liked ginkakuji a lot more than kinkakuji. i mean not only is the surrounding garden nicer to look at, but the fact that it's not silver, a much more rustic, authentic kind of look fit in a lot more with the surrounding areas than kinkaku which stuck out a bit like a sore thumb. i mean it was nice, but silver wins this one.

kinkakuji: 300yen.

heading south, we followed another one of the kyoto walks towards ryoanji temple, which apparently has another famous rock garden.

ryoanji temple: 500yen.

to be honest, it was nice, i still preferred nazenji a lot more because it was smaller, but i mean let's be honest, the real reason people come here is to, well, sleep.

now off to arashiyama for annabelle's adventure! last time she was here she got a taste of tofu ice cream, and was really looking forward to coming back here for that. so we boarded this little private train (i have a picture of me on the tracks, that's how little this train line is) and made our way over. the big plus about this train is that no matter how far you go, it's a set price.

/co-jrlearnsomethingfromthis!-ugh: 200yen.

upon arrival we headed south towards the bridge only to find that it wasn't there. we were losing daylight and all was looking in despair until we headed back across the bridge towards the station we arrived at and annabelle had a moment of, er what's that word... you know, when you all of a sudden are able to remember something?

i really need to get out of this country...

anyhoo, we made our way across and suddenly she sprinted ahead exclaiming, `HERE IT IS!!!!`

tofu ice cream: 250yen.

now i know what you're thinking... tofu ice cream? and i know what else you're thinking... yes, it very much so tastes like tofu.

it's not bad, really.

we made our way back to shi-jo for the gion festival in hopes to find a tonkatsu place (ahhh comfort food). the gion festival was absolutely nuts though, i don't think i've ever seen so many people packed along the streets before, but after a long and tiring search, we found what we were looking for! mmm katsu <3.

train ride back: 200yen.
katsu: 1300yen.

finally we wrapped up the night along the river side. it was a gorgeous night with performers all along the banks, but especially this one trepe that performed a kind of jazz that i must say, really really fit the atmosphere; almost like it was speaking to me.

p.s. thanks for the beer chris. twas good.

total spent: 8120yen.